Admittedly, my posting has been very sporadic of late (oh, who am I kidding, for the last 3 years...) It has been almost 6 years since my stroke (it will be 6 years on December 8, but I am getting waaay ahead of myself), and it seems that some of the side-effects are becoming a little more apparent to others. My wife has had some people comment to her that I seemed to be having problems swallowing during church awhile ago; others have noticed that I look really tired and I have had some tell me that they have noticed that I am having problems with my left leg being weak from time to time. I fell getting out of bed about 6 months ago and wound up with some pretty bad hip pain. When I went to physical therapy, they noticed that ever since my stroke I have changed the way I walk; when I had to relearn how to walk, I would "kick my left leg out" so that my right leg would not cross over. Over the next 5 years it became second nature to walk with my left leg constantly kicking out. The result is that it effectively makes me walk as if my left leg is shorter. What the physical therapist wants me to do is to force that left leg to come back in line when I walk; that should alleviate the hip pain. In essence, I have to re-learn how to re-learn how to walk. (I had noticed that for a few years people would ask my why I was limping...I did not realize I was limping, but that was the result of my left leg kicking out...) I said all that for this purpose: I think my side-effects are become more noticeable to those around me. I have known ever since my stroke that my deficiencies will one day become more evident. My neurologist told me that those symptoms (left leg weakness, left arm weakness, increased headaches, etc.) are not necessarily new problems; they have always been there but my brain compensates for those deficiencies and makes them seem to be absent. When I over-work my brain, it loses its ability to compensate and those deficiencies become evident. I know that many people will not understand what I am about to say, but those who have dealt with the after effects of a stroke might: this sucks!
Tomorrow I will preach the funeral for a dear friend of mine. He was the definition of a selfless person. I truly appreciated all that he did, but, when I was meeting with the family on Wednesday a memory came to me suddenly and I was suddenly overcome with emotion. Let me back up a little bit: After my stroke in December, 2008 my license was revoked for obvious reasons and it took me some time and practice before I was able to drive again. I finally got my license back in February, 2009. But, shortly after I got my license back the reality of the severity of my stroke became evident: my stroke had seriously impacted the PONS area of my brain stem, and therefore, a lot of my nerves were negatively impacted. One of the nerves that was damaged was the nerve that controls my eye movements; my left eye would would twitch, at times almost uncontrollably, and that made it really difficult to drive, particularly at night. That brings me to the memory that left me so emotional. Fast forwar
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