a stroke survivor story

I got the transcript today from the Disability Review hearing; some of the answers to their questions, as recorded in my records, make me wonder if they were actually reviewing me. Record: "Is there any evidence of brain trauma" Answer: "NO". REALLY? A Double Sided cerebellar infarction with 2 brain stem strokes, a decompressive craniotomy performed and there is NO EVIDENCE OF BRAIN TRAUMA? In the immortal words of Bugs Bunny, "What a maroon!" Another question: "Is there any evidence of balance problems?" Answer: "NO" What in the world? Another question: "Is there any evidence of memory problems?" Answer: "NO" I'm sorry, but that person could not have looked at my records to make that determination. Question: "Is there any evidence of headaches?" Answer: "NO" At this point, if it were not such a serious situation it would be absolutely laughable. They are going to rate my disability based upon

I have been working on a book chronicling my journey; as part of that book I have been including many of my blog posts. As I began reading the latter part of my book (the blog posts), I begin to think "boy, I am one boring guy..." But, as I have said before in an earlier blog post, what is average and mundane to most people can be a significant event for a stroke survivor. Going to a Christmas concert is not an event to write home to mom about...unless you have survived a near fatal stroke and should be dead. In that case, going to a Christmas concert is a big deal. But, if you have been a little bored to a stupor over some of my blog posts, it is just because at the time it is such a big deal; but in retrospect, some of them were not "blogworthy" events.

I have shared with many people my miraculous story, but, hopefully you will be able to read about it as well. I am in the process of putting together a book chronicling my struggles, triumphs and the miraculous recovery. The book, entitled "Living the life of a miracle: experiencing God's grace in the midst of a deep trial", will be in two parts. Part 1 tells a little about my history, my life before the stroke and the reality that something was not right. Part 2 will be my various blog posts since my stroke, giving a "real view" of what I felt and how I responded as I followed this journey. I am trying to make sure I include the Doctor notes and some of my MRI and CT scans in the appendices. My prayer is that it will be a good read and bring glory to God.

It looks like I have a partial answer about my claim for disability. I had my appointment with the Decision Review Officer on November 3...what I was told is that he can do several things: he can just decide to re-evaluate my compensation and give me a new rating without any future appointments; he can recommend me for more Compensation and Pension appointments to let them to make a new determination, or he can just recommend that my compensation level remains the same and close the case. Well, I did get an initial response: I have 4 additional C&P appointments in January. So, I should find out sometime after January 13....

Today is the two year anniversary of my stroke. I do have definite trouble from time to time, but I fell overwhelmingly good. I am still struggling a little with my blood pressure, which is a relatively new development, but other than that I feel really good.

What I said earlier, you know, about this being my 2 year anniversary...well...forget it; tomorrow is my 2 year anniversary. Everything else is still relevant, but, I was just a little eager with my posting. So, tomorrow will be my 2-year anniversary and in case I forget to post about it, you will know.

Well, today is the day...it was 2 years ago today that I suffered what, by all accounts, should have a fatal (or at least debilitating) stroke. Although these 2 years have had their ups and downs, I would have to say that I am truly blessed to be alive. My son in completing his first semester of his freshman year in college, my oldest daughter has her 7th grade band concert tonight and my youngest daughter has her first guitar "recital" on Thursday. These are, really, rather menial events; but, when you are faced with the reality of never witnessing them, they become very large events. I have become quite accustomed to answering people this way: when asked how I am feeling, I answer that I feel pretty good for a dead guy! Struggles are my new reality; I have issues with which I will deal for the rest of my life. But, even with the reality of those struggles, I am truly thankful to be alive!

Today I ran into my daughter's 4th grade teacher. As we were chatting, she told me that she was grading a recent test and one of the answers made her cry. In Social Studies, they are talking about planning events and how it might not happen exactly as was planned. On the test, the question asked was "Name a time that you planned something that did not happen the way you expected." My daughter wrote that she had been planning a birthday party, but then her daddy had a stroke so it did not happen. I almost fell apart at the school; I have spent so much time focusing on my own difficulties that I did not take the time to think how others are still dealing with the situation. Yes, it was nearly 2 years ago, but that does not erase the difficulties that some have had dealing with the result of that event. So, thanks Mrs. Kamp for reminding me that, even though I sometimes do not hear about those difficulties, it does not mean they do not exist.