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Happy New Year...

I know it is a day late, but I wanted to wish everyone a Happy New Year. It is hard to believe that I am starting my 6th year in my new life. I am 43, so that means that nearly 14% of my life has been post-stroke. I am so thankful for my family that has been  able to keep up with my changes. My wife is 40, which means that nearly 15% of her life has been post-stroke and yet she has been so faithful to support me and understand me. I have never felt a sense that she resents anything about me. Now it gets pretty tough. My son is 21, which means more than a quarter of his life - 28% - has been with a post-stroke dad! My oldest daughter is 15, which means that nearly half of her life - 40% - has been with a post-stroke dad! My youngest daughter is 12 which means that she has lived half of her life - 50% - with a dad that was post-stroke. Sometimes I feel bad that I cannot do what most dads can. I can't go and play baseball, softball or basketball with them because I just don't have the stamina. I have to come home from work and go straight to my room for a nap. I go to sleep early because I just don't have the endurance I once did. Some people really don't understand how frustrating it is to say "it's 9:00 - past my bedtime!" when  you are 43. I started to realize how drastically my life has changed when I start talking about some of my deficiencies and how hard it is everyday when and people say "Well, I know, I struggle with those problems everyday" and they are 60+. I told my wife that sometimes I feel like a 70 year old man who just happens to be 43. Well meaning people say "I know exactly how you feel..." Well, as nicely as I can say it, no you don't! I told my therapist one day that I did not have ANY of these problems for 38 years, then I had my stroke, and now I do. It was like flipping a switch. It was not a long process of signs that would be made evident every now and then...it literally happened overnight.

Ok...rant over. Back to what I was saying when I first started (did I mention that since my stroke I have had hard time keeping on track?) Happy New Year!

Comments

  1. Happy New Year! Best wishes for a happy and healthy 2014!

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