Skip to main content

I had an interesting day yesterday...

Ok, by now most of the regular followers of my blog know that I try, unsuccessfully at times, but I try to keep most of the posts pretty positive. I write about what I did, what I tried, and sucess I had, a Dr. visit that went extremel y well (as all my Dr. visits so far have done). But, this will not be one of those posts. Yesterday was a really interesting day. I would say that as long as I stayed busy, I had a normal day. But, when I was at home, just sitting, I was really down. I can't explain it, I was just a Negative Nelly all day at home. That is not like me. I am usually an Ollie Optimist. 
When everyone else is down, I can usually find a reason to be encouraged. But, yesterday I was in the dumps all day at home. I can only guess why: it is because I saw pictures from before my stroke, and I was missing that life. The truth is, my current existence stinks. Oh, I am getting used to it and I am not going to go Postal on someone, but truthfully it stinks. I have to learn almost everything over again. Not how to do it, but what I can or cannot do. Since I have had my "setback" it is worse. My leg hurts when I try to do someting as simple as put my shoes on. If my leg does not hurt, then it is my chest where I fell. My entire left side hurts. My wife and I can only guess that when I passed out, I must have hit the door way first before I hit the ground. So, I have to try everything a new way. Even yesterday while preaching, I had to preach froma chair. I know I should be rejoicing that I was able to perform my job, and I am thankful for that, but it was different, and it was all due to my stroke and the after-effects of that one event. 
Now, I am feeling better today. Maybe I was just tired and needed to sleep; maybe I have to be busy and I am facing a new week; maybe my appointment tomorrow is coming quickly and I am excited about it...regardless, I feel better today. I will feel best when  I am DONE with Drs. and I can finally get back to feeling better.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Making a BIG, but somewhat hurtful, decision...

A few years ago I was presented with the opportunity to come back to Stratford, Iowa, to First Baptist church, as their pastor; for those of you who have followed this blog for some time, FBC in Stratford was my first pastorate. Let's just say I prayed about it as I was jumping at the opportunity. The church has a parsonage, so I could live there and not have to worry about a houe payment; and I needed to slow down, and this was a part time position (which, as a side note, allowed for me to get a greater disability from the VA than when I was working full time with St. Croix Hospice...) We love Stratford, and absolutely love the church; the people are wonderful and accepted us, again, with open arms. This was, for me, the perfect position: I get to pastor a church I LOVE, I get to do life with people I LOVE, and I have already had the opportunity to do weddings and baptism services for kids (adults now) that I have known their entire lives. IT IS GREAT. The longer I have been here,

A stroke survivor's memory is tricky sometimes...

Tomorrow I will preach the funeral for a dear friend of mine. He was the definition of a selfless person. I truly appreciated all that he did, but, when I was meeting with the family on Wednesday a memory came to me suddenly and I was suddenly overcome with emotion. Let me back up a little bit: After my stroke in December, 2008 my license was revoked for obvious reasons and it took me some time and practice before I was able to drive again. I finally got my license back in February, 2009. But, shortly after I got my license back the reality of the severity of my stroke became evident: my stroke had seriously impacted the PONS area of my brain stem, and therefore, a lot of my nerves were negatively impacted. One of the nerves that was damaged was the nerve that controls my eye movements; my left eye would would twitch, at times almost uncontrollably, and that made it really difficult to drive, particularly at night. That brings me to the memory that left me so emotional. Fast forwar

It's been a long time...but here I am back in Stratford

It has been nearly 6 years since I have updated this blog; my apologies. For those that had been following for some time, since I last posted: I stepped down as Senior Pastor at New Covenant church in Knoxville, I moved to Ankeny, Iowa, started a new ministry with St. Croix hospice as Chaplain. I was chaplain with St. Croix for about 4 1/2 years, then in 2020 I moved back to Stratford to pastor First Baptist church. It was a big change going from chaplain work back to the pastorate.  I must confess, when I first came (back) to Stratford I was ready to pastor again! I love preaching; I love the ministry of being a pastor, and I love interacting with people long-term. (Being a chaplain is great, but you only interact with a family for a week or so, for some a little longer, but there was a constant upheaval of people and it was exhausting at times...) But, one thing that I have noticed since my stroke is that I get my feeling hurt easily. For instance, people leave the church all the tim