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Okay, so i've had a little time to think about things...

I know that my previous post was pretty depressing. I admit that, it was how I was feeling at the time, but it was depressing. I guess I was letting what the Dr. said today get me down. I know from a head knowledge standpoint that no one knows what happened to me. I get that. I guess that hearing the Dr. being so frank today did not do me well. Maybe it was good for me to hear a Dr. be frank with me. But, I said all this for this reason: I let it get me down. There will come times when I get down, and I know that and am ready for it, but I should understand that it is coming and not be surprised when those moments come.

The truth is that my life will, probably, never be the same again. I realize that and have come to grips with that. Every detail of my new life is viewed in the realm of that one event. The truth is that, no matter what I say, I will always be a stroke survivor. I don't have to live like one, but I am one. What I don't want and will not give in to is the temptation to let the one event dictate the rest of my life. I will slow down because it is good for  me, not because of my situation. I will spread around responsibilities because I should, not because of the situation I am in currently.  Everything I do will be because it is the right thing, not because of my situation, because I refuse to allow my situation to dictate the rest of my life.

Now, that does not mean that I am forgetting the stroke, I am just not going to allow my situation to determine what I can or cannot do. For the rest of my life I am going to be a stroke survivor, but I refuse to live like one.


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